Saturday, June 27, 2009

discouraged

Why does it seem men always ruin our days?

Last night I went to bed late, with a migrane, and the only thing I was excited about was the way I'd painted Alina's walls. I put a bunch of dragon flies and Butterflies on the 2 walls that don't get murals. I also added a few tiny ones to her flower picking mural. I think its super cute.



This picture is what the butterflies and dragonflies look like. I bought these guys at Walmart for 46 cents a piece and copied them in huge form on her walls.


Brent made a new york style pizza. It was pretty good - there was way too much cheese on it (the recipe called for a whole pound!) and I didn't eat much because cheese is super filling and my head hurt too bad. Alina thought it was fun to get in my lap and hold my food and try to feed it to me like we feed her or Raziel :-) this was super cute too.

But by bedtime, I was hot and tired and grumpy because Brent hadn't been excited about the decorations. I was also irritated because I still have alot of work left in Alina's room - much less the rest of the house. Brent never seems to be interested in it at all. Brent came to bed moaning and groaning because I didn't like his pizza and I didn't play this video game with him that he got just for me and I didn't brew tea before we came to bed. I offered to go make some and he said not to bother with it because it was late anyway. He wanted to be all cuddly and mushy and I didn't want him to touch me - I wanted to sleep! So, at 11 at night he decided to have an important conversation with me about how horrible his day was and how hard he tried to keep the house clean and it was a mess anyway. I don't even care that its a mess- its always a mess when he watches the kids. I don't know what his problem is but he never keeps it clean!! Its either that he doesn't care or is just downright not capable. I don't know what his problem is at all but it bothers me and I hadn't even said anything about the mess but he was making it out like I had raised hell about it and oh gosh he's so sad because he just can't keep the house clean or get anything done.

He doesn't do freaking anything! He watched the kids at the in-laws yesterday so they could help him out. He also played his video game for 2 hours. He also made pizza. That's it. He works his job and fixes the cars when they break if we have money. He drops the kids off at the sitters in the morning. THATS ALL.

Do you know what I do every day? I get up an hour before I have to leave so I can feed and dress the kids and get them ready for their day so that daddy can sleep a half hour longer because what takes me 10 minutes takes him 30. I then go to work and work for 9 hours at a job where I also organize our film work and make contacts and work on getting us more jobs and contracts for making more money because we never have enough. I pick up the kids on the way home and then I make dinner, clean the house and put the babies down, and sit and talk to my husband about how hard his day has been and how awful he has it at work and how this happened or that happened and then we watch tv and he goes to sleep and nine times out of ten i stay up and clean more.

Maybe he does more than I think but today I don't see it. Sunday? My day off? I'll take the kids to church in the morning, make them lunch, put them down for naps, mow the lawn, wash dishes, clean the mess they made yesterday, feed brent's dog and make dinner then listen to him tell me how hard his day was. Oh, and find a cute way to celebrate Father's day which is a week late because I had to drive for 9 hours with 2 babies and no A/C last sunday. Maybe, if there's time, I'll even paint the last mural on Alina's wall, or paint the 4th wall of our bedroom but probobly not because I also have laundry to wash and fold and put away and a table to clear and a floor to scrub.

I know I love him but today I can't help but want to scream and tell him he's forgotten to thank his wife for all the hard work she does.

1 comment:

  1. Awww
    I feel like this a lot. Men.
    They just don't understand:
    a. How MUCH we do. I mean, how did that shampoo that you were running low on magically get refilled. Or all the things we have to think of. It's endless amounts
    b.How imortant nesting and decorating our home is.

    You are pretty freaking amazing with how much you do. Seriously. Men just don't get it.

    Love HJ
    PS-The butterflies and decorations look awesome!

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