Well it's that time again at Kelly's Korner to Show us your life! I haven't been playing for a few weeks because I didn't feel like taking photos of recipes. But, I couldn't resist this week to give advice to other mommies - specifically newbies.
Do's and Don'ts of the Baby-Purchase-World
1) Front pack or sling
-- This one, you won't use as much until #2. My mom gave me one she'd made when we were kids and I didn't use it much with #1 but when #2 came along, I realized the world of multiple kids. Raziel would just chill in the frontpack and I was free (with both hands) to clean, cook, run around and do anything really. I did find, though, that these guys come in handy with newborns. You know, you'll go to the store and every grandma or anyone really will want to look at and (gasp) touch your newborn. Mommy-panic sets in. Did they wash their hands? Do they have the flu? They just breathed (BREATHED!!!!) on my baby!! OMG~ The wonderful thing about a sling or frontpack is baby is pressed right up against you and strangers are less likely to get in baby's face because that happens to be your personal boobie space - which people are aware of - and if they aren't, you don't seem so freaking weird telling them to give baby some space.
2) 2nd base / carseat
Hubby and I didn't do this till #1 got to a forward facing, and then we just used the bases in each car for #2. Problem: One person drops off kids at daycare/grandmas/etc, other person picks them up. The number of times I forgot to take the carseat out of my car and put it back in his was stupid and we're just now getting to where we have carseats in each car for each baby. It makes life SOO much easier.
If this is your second kid, INVEST~ I got one on craigslist for free because the lady didn't need hers anymore. It's not top-of-the-line but let me tell you, 2 kids in one stroller is so much better than 2 kids in 2 strollers.
First baby? INVEST (my new fav word lol) your arms are going to KILL you at the hospital. Baby's only 7lbs? sure. you wouldn't think it's gonna be that bad. If you don't use a boppy, even using pillows at the hospital doesn't really do the job. Your arms will get so tired because all that baby does for like 3 days is EAT and sleep. And, you'll want alot of that to be done in your arms. And, your arms will get tired and be VERY sore. It wasn't as bad with baby #2 for me because I adjusted and just laid him on the bed next to me and laid on my side. But, especially for the first child, or any hard labor, this isn't so do-able.
5) Pack and Play
Most perfect thing ever, I used it from newborn status and I am still using it with my almost 3 year old. This is something you CAN'T afford to skip.
6) Diaper Genie
If it's your 2nd you'll need it if the 1st is still in diapers. It's too much to keep up with. Don't worry about it, it seals that stinky smell and your kid wont get into it. I didn't use one with #1 but did (and I'm glad) when #2 came when #1 was only 18 months
7) Premie Clothes
So unless your kid is a 10-15lb chunker, newborns will be too big at birth. My kids were both full term, and they both weighed 7.5-8.5lbs but niether fit newborn clothes. Go ahead and grab maybe 4 or 5 (at the most) premie outfits for baby to wear in week 1 and 2.
1) Buying a Basinett
Now, I'm not saying you won't use it. That's silly. Fact is baby will use it for 3 months MAX and most kids actually become co-sleepers. Pack&Play's mostly include a basinett insert, or else BORROW one because there's really no point in spending $75+ on something your kid will hardly use. Call me redneck but I used an oversized laundry basket. Don't get me wrong, I had a hard pillow and lined it with a baby-themed fabric and you totally couldn't tell what it was.
2) Brand New Baby Clothes
What? 2nd hand? GASP. Your baby WON'T KNOW the difference LOL. Look, realistically, there are plenty of places to buy gently used baby clothing. Yes, splurge on a few fun items. Don't go all out and buy brand new everything - baby outgrows things way too fast. And, keep in mind. While $30 might be justifyable for a mommy purchase, it isn't for a baby clothing purchase. That's a lot of money to be pooped on, spit up on, and drooled on. Want something adorable in the window at Gymboree? Oh yes, that is what Grandmothers are for :-)
My kids didn't even notice their adorable Noah's ark one, and once they were 6 months it was torn down out of curiosity and eaten anyway.
and just some good old motherly advice for new mommies.
A few do-it's;
1) Prep meals weeks in advance before baby comes. Include things like snacks and easy stuff. Load up on things that take 10 minutes to have ready and on things that are already prepped (baby carrots, raisens, etc) because you WON'T have time to cook, or even really feel like it, for about 2 weeks at best
2) Pre launder and sort baby clothes
Don't convince yourself you'll find time later. Becuase you won't.
3) Take time away
You and hubby need time away from life before baby. Take a weekend. Don't go anywhere, but don't do chores or cook or visit anyone. Just hang out and spend time together. Also, after baby arrives, make it an early habit (as early as 1 or 2 weeks old) to take trips to the store with hubby without baby. It'll be hard to tear yourself away for a 20 minute trip, but DO IT. Let's be real ladies, you aren't going to be much in the romance department considering you're producing milk like a cow and feel like you just delieved one for at least 6 weeks. Take some time to just spend you and hubby time becuase he'll feel a bit left out. Most relatives don't realize hubby is working as hard as or harder than you. He didn't get a maternity leave. He takes shifts with baby too. And, mostly, the relatives say "oh look, sweet baby" and "good job, mommy." Take time to tell hubby "good job" often. He'll need it.
4) If help is offered, TAKE IT.
There's nothing that will burn you out faster than doing it all on your own. And, there's nothing that will frusterate you more than all the people offering to help off the bat that dissapeer when baby has colic 4 weeks later. Take it when its offered. Tell them to do laundry or feed baby a bottle or something and take a shower or a walk. Let them make dinner.
Don't do it
1) Road Trips
Don't take your baby for a road trip until they're at least 3 months old. It's ALOT of work and will take 2x as long because of stops for nursing, diaperchanging, your food, your peeing, etc. and, there's not much you can do when baby just gets grumpy unless you plan to stop every time that happens. You may as well stay home and tell the relatives to come see baby for themselves.
2) Entertain guests
If family comes, GREAT. Tell them they can cook and clean and do housework and change diapers, but you're getting your baby time in and they'll have to take turns. Don't feel like you have to get up and do the housework and let them play with baby. This is the time to assert yourself and tell guests they may visit if they help out but that consists of more than holding baby until he/she cries.
3) Make Plans
Just accept that nothing will go how its planned for a month or two, and things will go alot more smoothly.